Will the Horror Ever End!?
By: Lauryn
MustangGirl21@hotmail.com
May 8, 2001

“Goku!” ChiChi called from inside the house. “Come in here and get cleaned up! Bulma, Vegeta and Trunks (future) will be here soon!” Goku stopped doing pushups and ran inside. “Look at you. You’ve got dirt all over your face!” ChiChi said as she rubbed Goku’s face with a wet cloth. “Come on, ChiChi...it’s just a little get together!” ChiChi glared at him. “It’s more than that to me! Behave tonight!” Goku walked away mumbling about how ChiChi was talking to him like he was a kid. “What was that!?” she called after him. “Nothing.” Goku answered quickly. A few minutes later, Goku heard a knock on the door and walked out just as ChiChi was letting Bulma, Vegeta and Trunks in. Bulma and ChiChi immediately started chattering and sat down on the couch. Goku snuck past them and approached Vegeta and Trunks. “I’m leaving, you guys wanna come?” “Where’re you going?” Trunks asked. They all looked at the chattering women on the couch. “Does it matter?” Vegeta asked Trunks.

They were almost to the door when a voice stopped them. “Hey guys! Where’re you going!? Can I come??” Gohan called from across the room. “SHHHHHHH!!!” they all three told Gohan, raising their fingers to their lips. But it was too late. “Where’re you three going!?” ChiChi growled. Vegeta, Goku and Trunks straightened from the slouched positions they’d been in in their attempt to sneak out. “Uh...we were gonna go get something to eat.” Trunks said nervously. “Yeah!” Vegeta and Goku nodded in agreement. “There’s plenty of food in the kitchen, go get something there.” ChiChi replied, returning to talk to Bulma. They turned white at the mention of the kitchen, slowly turning to gaze into the room. “We’re going to run to the store real quick.” Bulma called after a few minutes. “We’ll be back soon.” ChiChi added as the two disappeared out the door. “And don’t even THINK about leaving this house!” they heard ChiChi shout as they drove off.

Goku, Trunks, Vegeta and Gohan sat in the living room, staring into the kitchen. “I’m hungry...” Goku mumbled. “Yeah, me too.” Trunks said, folding his arms. “We’d be out of here if it wasn’t for him!” Vegeta scolded, looking at Gohan. “Sorry guys, I didn’t know.” Gohan said sadly, looking at the floor. “It’s ok...” Goku said, still looking at the kitchen. “You can make it up to us by getting us something to eat from the....k...kitchen...” Gohan’s face went pale. “N---NO WAY! I’m not going in there! I’d rather take my chances with Cell!” “Well someone has to go, or I’m gonna starve...” Goku whined. “How about we all go at once...we can back each other up in case something tries anything funny...” Trunks suggested. “Yeah! Let’s do that.” Gohan agreed.

Goku, Trunks and Gohan all stood up and took a few steps forward before they realized they were missing someone. “Vegeta?” Goku said, turning back to Vegeta, who was still on the couch. “I’m not going back in that cursed place! It’s suicide!” he cried. Trunks grabbed his wrist and pulled him up. “Come on! We need you to back us up!” he argued as he pushed Vegeta in front of him. “You go first.” They all slowly approached the room they feared so much. Goku began to sweat a few feet away from the kitchen and turned back. “I changed my mind, I’m not that hungry!” Before he could run away, Vegeta, Trunks and Gohan pushed him toward the kitchen. “Get in there!” they yelled. Goku was forced into the kitchen by the push and ended up right in the middle of the room, while everyone else watched from the sidelines. He spun around, looking at all the appliances that nearly killed him last time, completely surrounded by them. “NOOOOOO!!!!” Goku screamed as he dove to the floor, covering his head. Vegeta tsked as he watched. “We’ve sent a good man to his death...” The others nodded in agreement as they watched Goku laying on the floor, covering his head and shouting for the evil kitchen appliances to get away from him.

After a few more minutes, Goku sat up and looked around. “I’m still alive...” he said in a quiet voice to himself. “Hey...hey guys! I’m alive!” he called to the other Saiyajins. They all looked at him, and quietly whispered among themselves about whether or not to venture into the kitchen. “I think we should go in.” Trunks said. “Yeah, dad looks fine.” Gohan agreed. “Fools.” Vegeta whispered. “They could have gotten to him...Kakarotto might be being controlled by the kitchens’ evil demons...it could be a trap.” The three pondered for a bit longer. Gohan decided to go check it out and walked up to Goku. “Hey dad, what’s your favorite thing in the world?” “Food!” Goku said without a second’s delay. Gohan smiled and turned to Trunks and Vegeta. “He’s fine! Come on!” he called. “They’ve gotten to him too!” Vegeta accused, pointing at Gohan. “Oh come on.” Trunks said, pulling Vegeta into the kitchen.

They all stood there a minute, fully expecting to be ambushed at any time, but nothing happened. “Why isn’t anything happening?” Vegeta asked. “I dunno...maybe we were just really clumsy last time and caused all that stuff to happen...” Gohan suggested. They all looked at each other.... “Naaaaa.” Vegeta’s eyes suddenly got wide and he focused on something that was behind Trunks. “What...what is it?” Trunks asked. “It’s...it’s the popcorn bag that tried to mutilate your face!” he stuttered, pointing a shaky finger. Trunks screamed out and covered his face as he jumped behind Goku. “Keep it away! Keep it away!!!” Vegeta burst out laughing and Trunks realized he’d been tricked. “That’s not funny, father!” he shouted. Vegeta wiped a tear from the corner of his eye and took a deep breath. “Sure it was, but seriously, it’s right behind you.” Trunks spun around, a terrified look returning to his face. “Where!!??” Again, Vegeta burst out laughing, causing Trunks’ face to turn red.

“Ok, let’s find something to eat.” Goku finally said, just now getting over the shock of seeing Vegeta having a sense of humor. He made his way to the fridge and opened it. “Wow! There’s a huge turkey in here!” “Great! Let’s cook it up.” Gohan said happily. “Sure...but how?” Everyone exchanged glances. “Maybe the stove...” Trunks said, turning to the new stove ChiChi had bought after the last one melted. “Ok...” Goku said, unsure if this was the right way. He set the turkey down over one of the burners and reached for the knob, his hand shaking as he remembered what happened last time. He dropped to his knees. “I can’t do it!” he cried, pounding his fist on the stove, accidentally breaking the knob off the stove. “Whoops...” “Good job Kakarotto, you managed to break it yet again..you’re t----” Vegeta stopped and walked a little closer to the stove. “Do you hear something?” Goku listened....”It sounds like something’s leaking...” After a moment of thought, Gohan screamed out. “Get away you two, its gas! If anyone makes a spark, this whole place could blow up!” Vegeta and Goku looked at each other then jumped away from the stove. “How do we stop it??” Vegeta asked. “Put the knob back on!” Trunks shouted. “It won’t go back on...but maybe if I...” Goku kneeled in front of the stove and pushed in what was left of the broken knob. Suddenly a huge flame shot up from the burner, launching the turkey into the air and throwing everyone else to the ground. “Not again!” Trunks cried. “Where’re my oversized mittens!!?? WHERE ARE THEY!?” Goku screamed, pulling things out of drawers and cabinets. “Forget it!” Vegeta yelled. “They won’t help much anyway.” “Speak for yourself!” Goku shot back as he found the potholders and put them on. “If I remember correctly, SOMEONE without these burnt his hands last time.” “Cram it!” Vegeta growled. Out of nowhere, a crispy turkey fell into Gohan’s arms. “AHHHHH!!!!!IT’S TRYING TO KILL ME!!” Gohan screamed, throwing the turkey at Goku, who juggled it a few times screaming in terror before he tossed it to Vegeta, who tossed it to Trunks. Trunks screamed. “It has no face!!! IT’S TRYING TO GET MINE!” He dropped it onto the floor and everyone scattered into different corners of the kitchen.

After a while of standing in the corner, pressed against the wall, Goku grabbed a long BBQ fork that was nearby. He took a deep breath and clutched the fork with his oversized mittens. He took a few steps forward, then ran back to the corner. “Get out there.” Vegeta called from his corner. Goku edged out again until he was a few inches from the turkey. He knelt down cautiously and poked the bird with the fork. It didn’t move at first so he poked it harder, causing the turkey to get stuck on the fork. “It’s trying to pull me in!!!” Goku cried, trying to take the fork back. “Help!!!HELP!!!” “Don’t worry, I’ll save you!!” Trunks called as he took a running start and dove out to Goku...severely overestimating the distance. He slid across the floor, right past Goku and stopped face to ‘face’ with the turkey. As Goku continued to struggle to regain the fork, juices from the turkey shot onto Trunks’ face. “NOOOOO!!!!IT’S TRYING TO DAMAGE MY PERFECT COMPLEXION!!” Trunks screamed in terror as he threw his hands over his face, rolling back and forth as if he were in pain. Vegeta crawled out to Goku and grabbed his wrist, attempting to aid in regaining the fork. Finally, the turkey released the fork and Vegeta and Goku flew backwards, slamming into a few cabinets. They sat there, looking out at Trunks who was screaming bloody murder, holding his face. “We have to help him!” Goku cried, starting to get up. “No,” Vegeta said calmly, pulling Goku back. “It’s too late for him.” Goku gasped. “But we can’t just leave him out there!” Vegeta looked out at Trunks. “He knew the risks of coming in here...” “But....but he’s your son!” Goku pleaded. “I can always make another one!” Vegeta yelled. “But what are the chances he’ll be as pretty as Trunks?” Goku argued. Vegeta put his hand up to his chin, deep in thought. “Ok, let’s get him.” he finally said.

Vegeta pulled himself across the floor on his stomach, Goku holding his ankles. He finally got to Trunks, who wasn’t moving anymore. Vegeta crawled up beside him. “Hey...you still alive?” he said, poking his face. There was no response. Vegeta looked back at Goku. “We’re too late Kakarotto...we waited to long.” They both looked sad for a minute and Goku started to pull Vegeta back. Suddenly, Trunks moaned and grabbed Vegeta’s wrist, pulling him back to him, causing Goku to loose his grip on Vegeta. “Noo!” Goku cried as he watched Trunks sit up, his face covered in grease. “Zombie!!!” Vegeta shouted in terror as Trunks latched onto him. “Help...me!!!” Trunks moaned as he wrapped his arms around Vegeta. “Abort Vegeta!! ABORT THE MISSION!!” Goku screamed. “I can’t get away from him! HELP!!!” Goku lunged forward and grabbed Vegeta around the waist, pulling him back to safety...or so they thought. “He’s still on me!” Vegeta cried, looking at Trunks who was still holding onto him. Goku grabbed Trunks and held him back. “I have an idea!” Vegeta said as he got up and ran to the sink, pulling out the hose looking nozzle type thing, aiming it at Trunks’ face. “Hold on son!” he cried, pulling the handle....but nothing happened. “The water Vegeta! Turn on the water! Hurry! I can’t hold him much longer!!” Goku shouted. Trunks just lay there not moving in Goku’s grip. Vegeta dove at the sink and turned on the water, then shot water at Trunks’ face. He stopped and gasped in horror. “It didn’t work! There’s still grease all over his face!” Trunks moaned and twitched a little before going limp. “We’re losing him!!” Goku cried. Vegeta looked around frantically, and spotted some liquid soap. He made another dive for it and ran back to Trunks, lathering it up on his face and then spraying more water. There was a tense moment as the suds rinsed away. “It worked!” Goku exclaimed happily, looking at Trunks’ perfectly clear face. “But are we too late?” Vegeta asked, noticing that Trunks hadn’t waken up. They waiting for a few moments before Trunks stirred and woke up. He reached up and felt his face. “I’m...I’m still perfect!” he shouted happily, jumping up from the floor. Vegeta and Goku sighed in relief.

“Hey...where’s Gohan?” Goku asked, looking around, finally spotting him in the corner, rocking back and forth with his knees tucked under his chin. Goku approached him carefully. “Son....are you ok?” Gohan looked up at him and hissed, causing Goku to jump back in fear, retreating back to Vegeta and Trunks. “He’s snapped.” Goku said sadly. “I’ve lost my only son to a turkey!!!” Goku screamed as he dropped to his knees. “A TURKEY!!!” Goku buried his face in his hands and wept for a minute. “Oh relax, Kakarotto. It’s not like you can’t make a new son.” Vegeta said. Goku stopped and looked up. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” he agreed, getting back to his feet. Goku saw the expression on Trunks’ and Vegeta’s face turn to fear, focused on something behind him. He heard heavy, muffled breathing behind him and slowly turned to see what it was. Behind him, Gohan had put his head in the turkey and stood there waving his arms blindly. Goku raised his hand to his mouth in horror, taking a few steps back away from Gohan. “Have some turkey, father.” Gohan said from inside the turkey. “No...no, stay back!” Goku stuttered. Suddenly, Gohan launched himself at Goku. Vegeta and Trunks ran to get out of the way as Gohan chased him. Goku ran outside, followed by Gohan, and ran through the woods. He ran as fast as he could, looking back every now and then to see if his bird son was still after him. Suddenly, he tripped and fell. (Bet you saw that coming, let’s face it, who am I to break tradition?) He turned onto his back and covered his face with his arms, screaming bloody murder. “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!” he stopped and took another breath. “AHHHHHHHHHHHHH.....hey....” Goku sat up and looked around. “What’s the freaken holdup?” About ten minutes later, Gohan stumbled into sight, bumping into every tree in his path. Goku stood up and watched his bird son stumble right by him blindly. “Ahem” Goku said with annoyance. Gohan spun around, the turkey’s wings flapped a bit. “Father?” Gohan said in a demented voice. “I’m right here.” Goku replied. Gohan stumbled over to his father’s voice. “No, to the left.” Gohan turned to the left and reached out, finally finding where Goku was. He cleared his voice and looked up at Goku. “Have some turkey, father.” he repeated, flailing his arms around. Goku screamed and ran at full speed back to the house, walking back in calmly and sitting on the couch. Vegeta and Trunks looked at him in confusion. “Where’s your insane son?” Vegeta asked as Goku turned on the TV. “He’ll be here in about ten minutes.” he replied.

Sure enough, ten minutes later Gohan stumbled into the house, the turkey on his head looking extra tender from everything he’d bumped into. The horror began again as he chased everyone around. “Everyone hide!” Trunks called. Goku dove behind the couch, Vegeta hid under the table, and Trunks hid behind a lamp sitting on a table. They sat there in silence, listening to Gohan bump into things. Then there was silence. “Marco...” Gohan finally said. “Polo!” Goku shouted back. “Kakarotto, no!!!” Vegeta yelled, but it was too late. Gohan leaned over the couch and Goku looked up to see a huge turkey staring down at him. “Die, evil demon boy!!!” Goku screamed as he prepared to blast the turkey with a ki attack. “No Goku!! The gas is still on! You’ll kill us all!!” Trunks screamed. In a fit of insanity, Goku laughed psychotically and fired the blast....

ChiChi and Bulma, who were driving home, noticed a HUGE mushroom cloud form in the sky. “I wonder what that is.” ChiChi wondered. Bulma thought for a moment. “Say....that’s pretty close to where your house is...” ChiChi’s eyes narrowed and she stepped on the gas all the way, speeding to the house. When they arrived, all they saw was a huge crater where the house shoulda been. Inside the crater, Gohan was lying on his back, unconscious. Vegeta was sitting on the ground, holding onto a table leg, all that remained of the table he’d been under. Trunks was standing to the side, holding a smoking lamp in front of his face, clutching it tightly, staring straight ahead. ChiChi and Bulma looked around and finally found Goku towards the edge of the crater. He was sitting on the ground, holding a burnt up turkey leg, still wearing the potholders on his hands. He laughed and threw the turkey leg to the ground, pointing at it. “I killed you! You thought you’d won, but I killed you, you stupid son of a B---” “GOKU!!!!!!” ChiChi screamed. He stopped and looked at her. “Hi honey, home so soon?” he asked. “Home?” she hollered, looking around. “WHAT HOME!?” “You can’t get mad ChiChi!!! We NEVER left the house! You never said we couldn’t destroy it!” Gohan sat up. “What’re you talking about, we did so leave the house! Remember, I chased you through the woods.” Goku glared over at Gohan, then chucked the turkey leg at him, smacking him in the forehead, causing Gohan to pass out again.

Bulma walked over to Vegeta, who was still clinging to the table leg. “Are you ok?” she asked, putting her hands on his shoulders. He didn’t move for a minute, as he stared off into space. She tried to take the table leg from his hands. “Can I have this...” she said, struggling to break his grip. Suddenly, he dropped the table leg and looked at Bulma. “I don’t wanna fight anymore...” he whimpered as he wrapped his arms around her. “Hold me.” Bulma looked back at Goku. “You broke Vegeta!!!” she cried. “Thank you.” She smiled as she led Vegeta over to Trunks. “Trunks? Can you hear me?” Bulma said, noticing that he was still staring straight ahead. After a minute, he slowly shook his head no. “Don’t let the turkey get my face...” he whispered. “You poor boy...” Bulma said as she took Trunks’ and Vegeta’s hand, leading them to the car.

MUCH LATER....

Vegeta was sitting at the table, along with Trunks. “Guess what we’re having for dinner?” Bulma said happily as she set a plate on the table. They looked down and saw a huge turkey sitting there. Vegeta and Trunks screamed out in terror, both falling backwards out of their chairs. “Get that demon bird away from me!!” Vegeta shouted as he got up and ran from the room. “It’s after my face!!” Trunks cried, putting his hands over his face. “MY BEAUTIFUL FACE! KEEP IT AWAY!!! KEEP IT AWAY!!!” He turned and ran from the room screaming. Bulma blinked and looked at the turkey. “Oh no...my future self is gonna kill me when I send her son back with an acute fear of turkeys...”

MEANWHILE...

Goku sat in an all white room with padded walls, laughing to himself as he rocked back and forth in his straight jacket. “No, Mr. Chuckles, I don’t want to kill everyone on earth...” he said to no one. “Well, ok, if you insist.” he said, laughing. ChiChi sadly watched him for a while longer, then walked across the hallway and looked into another white room where Gohan was. He looked up and saw his mother. He jumped up and ran to the small window she was looking into. He looked at her and smiled... “Have some turkey mother.”